Amos the Famous Dog gets to roam free tomorrow and for the next 48 hours. He is chasing his wagging tail in a circle as I type out of anticipation. I have never seen him do this before so I know it is an act of giddyness. My spouse and I are headed south to Sumter County for the weekend to visit with Amos' grand-family. He was so anxious he wouldn't even eat his dinner tonight. I told him he couldn't get up til he finished the way my mama used to do when she served lima beans. I would ask to be excused to the potty after sitting silently for 20 minutes while mom cleaned and the rest of the family watched Step By Step. I would put as many in my mouth as I could as any smart child would do and I would spit them in the toilet and flush. I would smile so big my whole way back to the table until I got back to the table and saw that there were still atleast two more mouthfuls of those gross-textured, chalk flavored ovals of green. Mama surely wouldn't fall for the plea to use the bathroom again and she had already taken my napkin (my final effort) from the table so I was stuck. That mama....... always thinking one step ahead! I don't remember how the story ended but I do remember feeling the worst knot in my stomach the whole night. First, I was starving and so were those kids in Africa and now they were more starving since my beans would go to waste. Second, I had to sit lonely underneath the dim light just staring at those nasty life sucking boogers until my mom forgot I was being punished. To this date I despise.....I loathe, abhor, detest viciously - lima beans. Luckily, our children will never have to suffer through the turmoil of the lima bean because I vow to never ever ever ever serve them. Ever. Poor Brad as he is an LB fan.
Anyway, Amos' dinner sits untouched, his sleepover bag is packed for grandma's house and I am giving him some Benadryl in 20 minutes so he'll sleep through his anticipation. I remember being a young kiddiepoo like Amos and getting all antsy over my trip to Atlanta to stay at Nana's house. Onetime when I stayed at Nana's house and mama and daddy weren't there Nana and my aunts took me to Penney's I think to buy some new white shoes with lace socks and a dress. I think I even bought a matching headband. I loved that sailor blue striped dress and my shoes that allowed me to slide like a real dancer and twirler on the hardwood floors. I wore the outfit to my cousins wedding whom I didn't really know at that age but they will surely never forget me. I literally had my my my my my boogie shoes on and tore up the dance floor. And most Sunday's when I stayed with Nana and grandad (whom she calls "Punky" and I just love it) I would awake to a uniquely prepared pancake breakfast. I could never sleep the night before a trip to Nana's house but it was worth my tired eyes the next day to lie awake and dream of all the fun to be had.
Mr. Brad is even cleaning Dr. Amos' ears right now. Amos doesn't mind it because he knows this activity means he gets to have people who love him rub his head and his ears all weekend. And I don't mind it as long as I don't have to do it! Okay, off to get myself ready for a weekend of sitting on my favorite front porch in America and reading my latest book. Amos can run through the fields and chase squirrels without the threats of Peachtree road all around him. I can read and listen to the quiet while staring at my favorite bush full of exploding pink flowers (maybe while swatting a gnat or three). Brad can enjoy lima beans (his mama likes to cook him his favorites when he is home so now is his chance) and we can all slow down for a weekend and enjoy the blessings of family. South Georgia or bust!
Oh, and, I want to be Sarah Palin when I grow up. Does anyone remember Northern Exposure? I used to love to watch this show with mama. I would love one day for Brad to up and leave this fast paced city life to move me to somewhere intriguing and mysterious like Alaska. I would certainly name my kids after cool trees and cities and favorite sports too if I were to live the exotic life in Alaska. Really.
Oh, and, did you feel the weather tonight before the dinner hour? There was the slightest hint of fall in the air and I wanted to skip all the way around the block. I love the fall. I hate lima beans but love the fall.
Seven Surprises of the First Christmas
14 hours ago
I love your writing so much! I literally laughed at loud at "those nasty life sucking boogers"!!! I will never, ever, ever make lima beans for you. Maybe you could send a few cans to Africa to redeem the wastefulness of your youth! :)
ReplyDeleteHave fun in Plains!
I did not know that you loathed lima beans as much as you do... sorry for all those years of fixing them but your dad loves them, like Brad so I would fix things that I thought he might like too. In reality, none of ya'll ate anything green unless it was a sour apple flavored candy worm! No green beans, no peas, no brocolli, no turnip greens, no green cucumbers, peppers, spinach, or anything. It was hard trying to prepare ntritious meals and evryone was PICKY.... I can't wait for your children to clog the toilets with their veggies.
ReplyDeleteLove you any way,
Mom