Everyone's least favorite friend (and daughter, and wife, and mother)

It's the insomniac.

I would like to be a stand up comedian in the wee hours of the night and crack jokes about the crazy insomniac. Yesterday I asked Brad when we get back to normal if he would like to do insomnia with me? He said we've already been doing that. I was referring to "insanity" the 60 day workout craze that has hit households everywhere.

Yesterday morning I had coffee with some other mom's with two under two. Poor ladies. Two of them have baby-babies and are still waking in the night to feed a little person. I have true sympathy for them because that is a hard season of life and the exhaustion level is unfathomable - especially with another mini-tornado at home to entertain. Of course, it was obvious they were shy to complain of any lack of sleep because of the insomniac across the table. Really though, the cool thing about insomnia is I don't get tired so I really do have oodles and oodles of sympathy for my new mommy friends who are having sleep disturbances with a waking newborn.

Further, you can tell on the phone each day with my husband or highly tolerant mother that they don't want to ask the normal question at the beginning of a phone conversation. "How are you?" Unfortunately, for the insomniac that just begs for a play by play of how unsettling your last 10 hours were while the rest of the world slept.

Anyway, I have been very real with this "dilemma" since it began for one purpose only. Yes, maybe someone somewhere can relate and will have an encouraging word or two but that isn't the reason for my transparency. I believe in full disclosure because deep down I am certain that this valley will be someone else's valley one day soon. Or maybe it won't be the same exact disfunction but it will be one that will rock someone's world the way this has rocked ours this last season. I've always had a hard time with the scripture that refer to "delighting in trials." That may be for you but for me I just don't find myself delighting in hardship, knowing that it is bringing about something greater. But I can honestly say this time that I am confident that God will use my story in a way that is much bigger and much more impactful than I could have imagined...and by that time hopefully I won't even remember what it feels like to have forgotten how to sleep.

So, to those of you who have to see me fairly often - thank you for asking the dreaded question even though you know the answer won't be pretty. Thank you, too, for your prayers. I feel them - especially in the wee wee hours of the morning when my body wants to be doing jumping jacks in a snow storm. I look forward to sharing stories of redemption and healing very very soon.